View Full Version : Help with couple splitting up and 3 year old son

26-04-2008, 05:41 PM
I could do with a little advice, for reasons currently unknown my sister and boyfriend have decided to split. It is still in the early stages and solicitors are not involved yet.

My sister and her boyfriend have been living together for about 4 years, they have a son together who is 3 years. Approx 2 years ago her boyfriend sold his small house for a larger one. Only he is on the mortgage and he is the only one that pays it. Sister buys the food one week and pays the household bills the next. They are not married.

Sister sold her car for a larger one (to accomodate kiddie) and put 600 pounds of the proceeds into a new one, boyfriend put in the rest ( the car is in his name, he did put more money into buying it but sister pays the insurance, petrol etc)

They have now split and boyfriend has advised sister that she is not entitled to anything as she has had 'free use of the facilites' (his exact words! apparently he has sought legal advice but no sign of a sol as of yet)

I am hoping they can sort this out amicably, but i want to get as much info as possible before we instruct solicitors (we are hoping solicitors will only be required for the matter of maitenance and who and what days they share thier son)

First questions is does she have any rights? She is not after the house, she just wants him to pull his weight financially, but he may start trying to pull fast ones!

Going back to the car boyfriend has offered to pay the 600 back to her, personally i feel he should give her the car as she needs it more than him, book price is only about 1500 pounds.

She is going to the council on Monday to get herself on the housing list, she has moved in with mum and dad but mum is 60 dad is 70 and have a small bungalow, not nearly big enough for sis, kiddie, mum, dad and thier two dogs!



26-04-2008, 05:55 PM
This may have some useful info for you Yaff


26-04-2008, 09:16 PM
As far as I know she has virtually the same rights as if they were married now. So effectively 50% of communal property, regardless of who's name is on the ownership papers. I believe she will also have a legel right to any pension he has paid into.

27-04-2008, 04:45 PM
Not quite correct; if you are not married you are not entitled to 50% of anything. They are trying to introduce this law, for couples who have been together for more than two years, to bring it into line with several countries overseas.

Nope to the pension also, not married, no rights.

She is going to need legal help with this. If he is not going to do anything voluntarily, she will have to bring in the heavy weights.

27-04-2008, 05:26 PM
What a horrible situation Yaff, yet again another parent more than willing to watch thier own child go without, so to spite the other parent.

Theres an organisation called Gingerbread that has been going for sometime as my mum was involved with them in 28 years ago they may also be able to give emotional support.

Gingerbread is an organisation, run by lone parents, whose aim is to offer other lone parents practical and emotional support. Gingerbread also speaks out for us in the media and politics.

Their Advice Line offers confidential advice on anything from childcare to domestic violence, including benefits, education and housing. Or maybe you just want someone to talk to. Here you will find a sympathetic, listening ear. Their rule is "as long as it takes."

Phone: 0800 018 4318
9am to 5pm Mondays to Fridays.
If you prefer to receive advice by e-mail, contact them at: advice@gingerbread.org.uk
They stress that this is not an emergency e-mail service as replies can take up to 5 working days.

Gingerbread also offers support groups all over England and Wales. These are great places to go with your children and there are many planned outings and social activities for adults. You will also receive some discount vouchers. Many excellent publications are also available.

Contact the phone number above or visit: www.gingerbread.org.uk

27-04-2008, 05:51 PM
Thank you all, this is really a sad situation. Sister is only 25, she has not even lived yet and is having to go through this already.

Hocus..Gingerbread sounds good, i will give her the information.

I am secretly annoyed with her for not making some sort of back up plan or at least look into her rights should anything go wrong (or maybe that is just what i would do) she thought they would live happily ever after but there is nothing wrong with being prepared.

Otherhalf done his share by making sure everything was in his name...covered his backside rather well!!

27-04-2008, 06:24 PM
Its a shame when you have to prepare for a fall out, my friend was warned about getting a dual mortgage and she replied with " i wouldn't be buying a house with him if i couldn't trust him"

when they split she discovered he had forged her name and 30,000 extra was owing on her home it was awful and a shame you have to think along the lines of how do i protect my own **** at all times, but it seems it is the way it is now.:(